Saying goodbye to living life is unavoidable, such is the case with every race including human. People belonging to any given age group can be affected because everyone wishes to live a long life. However, once people have lived their lives for nearly 50 to 60 years, the fear of death starts to creep in. At this age, most people start going for their retirement and all they do is think about their past or worry about the end of their existence. Not everyone will be willing to believe but as a matter of fact, this fear can ruin health as anxiety starts to build up. Due to this, people start losing track of their eating habits, regular medical check-ups and other things to avoid for staying disease-free.
Some people are worried because they aren’t sure how would their children be when they’ll be gone. Others still have a wish list they want to complete before they die. Furthermore, some people might have responsibilities that need to be filled up or their loved one(s) might not have anyone else besides them. If you are also struggling with this fear, then this write up is a must-read for you and you need to believe that you’ve lived a good life and should do the same with the rest also.
Savour every remaining bit of your life
Death is something that will come around either today or on some other day. So, instead of living in its fear, it is better to focus on the present moment and enjoy it to the fullest. It is not possible to predict the way and time it would arrive. Therefore, spend more and more time with your family and friends. Try to indulge more in positive conversations. Visit old places that have special memories. Be an active participant in your family and social gatherings. Savour all the flavors of the food you wish to.
Leave the jobs that do not give you happiness and aren’t satisfying even. Finding and again meeting your long lost friends can be an objective you would like to accomplish. You can also make attempts to rectify your past mistakes because, at this stage of life, you don’t fear losing anything more. You should try to forgive other people for things they’ve done to you. Moreover, overcoming one’s own regret and guilt is necessary. You can initiate attempts to forgive others and yourself too. This will give you a sense of peace and make you happy for doing something, not everyone is capable of.
Try to accept the reality of mortality
The fear of death has haunted mankind since time immemorial, and its acceptance is the best way to get past it. Birth and death are related events and parts of the same cycle. Furthermore, the moment any human is born, at the same instant, their mortality is decided. Accepting mortality will help you see above fear and recognise yourself as an important part of the ecosystem. And how greatly your life has helped in passing on human species.
If you stop focusing on the fact that everything is going to end, life will get a lot easier. Look on the positive side and see how lucky you were to spend your life with loved ones and that you’ve grown old with them. You’ve seen different phases of life together, moments of happiness, griefs, regrets. Recollect your past and see how your children have grown from babies to adults who are capable of doing anything they’d like to and you can be assured to rest in peace.
Indulge in activities you’ve never done before
If you are counted among the people who have been busy their entire life, then now is the time to do anything you always wanted to. If your job or household duties restricted you from reading your favourite authors, then do it now. Your wish to learn guitar or some other musical instrument can come true at this phase of life. Moreover, learning cannot be restricted by anything, especially by age. You can get your canvas and paint all your thoughts and vision that have always stayed in the backdrop of your mind.
You can take up new hobbies such as writing. You can write about your life, your family history and can even go for journal writing or story writing can be interesting as well. You can prepare a wishlist and write everything you’ve missed on to. You can go for exercising and staying active throughout the day. You can also share your experiences with younger members of the family. The basic motive behind doing all this is to seek happiness and keep yourself busy. If you’ll stay busy, then you will have no time for thinking about all these and every night will be a night of peaceful sleep.
Turn towards spirituality and peaceful living
The involvement of rituals and spirituality is an inseparable part of life. It will appear again and again over time irrespective of the fact that you are a believer or a non-believer. Spirituality introduces a new dimension in life and it has a vast depth that is yet to be explored. People fear complexities but you can simply begin by visiting your sacred place twice a week and then go for a daily visit or just write a daily diary. A number of studies have also proven that people involved in spiritual activities are less likely to suffer from the fear of death.
It will give you a new sense of belongingness to the almighty. This develops a faith that someone is there to back you up. You can find out about your family rituals and see if there’s any significant history related to your family name regarding the same. This is not merely praying but you’ll be surprised to know that as you dive deeper a lot of solutions will start emerging. The spiritual theories discuss the fact of peaceful living in every possible aspect and the motive is to restore peace against every odd.
Look out for professional help
People are not at ease when it comes to sharing their fear and seeking professional help. The foremost thing towards solving this problem is pushing away shyness. If you think this anxiety is disturbing your normal functioning and is making you less productive, then it’s time to get some help. A mental health specialist can execute various methods including therapies and medication if needed. You should be truthful to your therapist and shouldn’t lie about the extent of trouble this thought brings in. Therapies employed can be as basic as cognitive behavior therapy or as challenging as exposure therapy.
Initially, the specialists stick to cognitive behavior therapy because all they do is make you realize that you don’t have to be afraid at all and can sometimes even explain the irrelevancy of the thought. Exposure therapy can be stressful because the specialist will put you to the exact situation of death you are afraid to face. In severe cases, the doctor can even recommend medicines but you should take note that this will only take away your anxiety for a short time. If you wish to settle your issue once and for all, then therapy will be better.
Wrap up your final responsibilities
Sometimes, the fear of death is there because of unfinished business. You have tasks to complete and to assign as well. One of the important ones is choosing the power of attorney so that you can rest assure about financial and other decisions. Make sure to prepare a will, your family has every right to know what all you own. Moreover, it is not necessary to pass everything you possess to family members only, you can give it to anyone you want or for charity too. This will drive away all the possibilities of a fight over gaining ownership of things left behind by you.
You can also get yourself a health proxy (a legal document) so that all your last wishes can be completed. Do prepare a list of the do’s and don’t for your memorial service. You can decide whether your parting ceremony will be simple and consist of a eulogy and sermon or it will be a grand feast to celebrate the life you lived. This way, you’ll be putting forward a few of your last wishes and at the same time removing a good amount of burden from the heads of your loved ones.